Isn't it romantic?
Feb. 14th, 2005 10:24 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
saint_monkeyHappy Saint Valentine's day! To honor the patron saint of lovers and beekeepers, we celebrate this day by whacking our enemies in one Machiavellian swoop. That, and spending time with the one we love. Not many people know that the actual Saint Valentine was martyred by the Hallmark company, who had his heart removed and mailed to his loved one, stapled to a card.
I can make that story up, because there are lots of stories about the Saint, and nobody can really pin one down as being the "real" slim shady. The most popular version (taken from a 14th century woodcut,) goes like this. Valentinus was supposed to have married young christians against the edict of Emperor Claudius the Second (Known stylistically as "Claudius the Goth.") Claudius had decided that young men could not marry, as single men made better soldiers. Valentine would arrange secret weddings with notes. (Supposedly.) Thankfully, we do not treat our lovers as Saint Valentine was treated by Claudius the Goth. When Valentinus didn't do as the Emperor liked, he had him beaten with clubs and stones, (making the holiday the only saint's day that I know of that could be logically represented by two of the four suits of the deck,) and finally beheaded him. Before he was ordered to death, the Saint-to-be (Supposedly,) wrote letters to his love, (his jailer's daughter,) signed "From your Valentine." (Awwwwwww.)
Of course, that's what the Catholics would have you believe. Naturally there is some Pagan crossover involved. The Romans celebrated "Lupercalia" on the Ides of February, which was a festival devoted to Juno, goddess of Febris, or "Feverish Love." They had a sort of wife-swap style lottery, where the names would go into a pot, and then people would pair up, swap a small token of their esteem, and then get all Febris with one another.
So Valentine's day was the church's calculated attempt to get the recently converted Romans to stop having a February 15th love-train style orgy by casually slipping the attention to a February 14th "romantic love" holiday focusing on fidelity. If everyone got their jollies off with their partner on the 14th, they wouldn't be so keen (or energetic) to get all jolly with their neighbor on the 15th.
Finally, here's what buying a Valentine's day card will get you: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/57695.stm
I can make that story up, because there are lots of stories about the Saint, and nobody can really pin one down as being the "real" slim shady. The most popular version (taken from a 14th century woodcut,) goes like this. Valentinus was supposed to have married young christians against the edict of Emperor Claudius the Second (Known stylistically as "Claudius the Goth.") Claudius had decided that young men could not marry, as single men made better soldiers. Valentine would arrange secret weddings with notes. (Supposedly.) Thankfully, we do not treat our lovers as Saint Valentine was treated by Claudius the Goth. When Valentinus didn't do as the Emperor liked, he had him beaten with clubs and stones, (making the holiday the only saint's day that I know of that could be logically represented by two of the four suits of the deck,) and finally beheaded him. Before he was ordered to death, the Saint-to-be (Supposedly,) wrote letters to his love, (his jailer's daughter,) signed "From your Valentine." (Awwwwwww.)
Of course, that's what the Catholics would have you believe. Naturally there is some Pagan crossover involved. The Romans celebrated "Lupercalia" on the Ides of February, which was a festival devoted to Juno, goddess of Febris, or "Feverish Love." They had a sort of wife-swap style lottery, where the names would go into a pot, and then people would pair up, swap a small token of their esteem, and then get all Febris with one another.
So Valentine's day was the church's calculated attempt to get the recently converted Romans to stop having a February 15th love-train style orgy by casually slipping the attention to a February 14th "romantic love" holiday focusing on fidelity. If everyone got their jollies off with their partner on the 14th, they wouldn't be so keen (or energetic) to get all jolly with their neighbor on the 15th.
Finally, here's what buying a Valentine's day card will get you: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/57695.stm
