ribs

This is NOT a parody, I swear before you, that this is REAL.


For Immediate Release
Office of the Press Secretary
January 22, 2004

Remarks by the President to the Press Pool
Nothin' Fancy Cafe
Roswell, New Mexico


11:25 A.M. MST

THE PRESIDENT: I need some ribs.

Q Mr. President, how are you?

THE PRESIDENT: I'm hungry and I'm going to order some ribs.

Q What would you like?

THE PRESIDENT: Whatever you think I'd like.

Q Sir, on homeland security, critics would say you simply haven't spent enough to keep the country secure.

THE PRESIDENT: My job is to secure the homeland and that's exactly what we're going to do. But I'm here to take somebody's order. That would be you, Stretch -- what would you like? Put some of your high-priced money right here to try to help the local economy. You get paid a lot of money, you ought to be buying some food here. It's part of how the economy grows. You've got plenty of money in your pocket, and when you spend it, it drives the economy forward. So what would you like to eat?

Q Right behind you, whatever you order.

THE PRESIDENT: I'm ordering ribs. David, do you need a rib?

Q But Mr. President --

THE PRESIDENT: Stretch, thank you, this is not a press conference. This is my chance to help this lady put some money in her pocket. Let me explain how the economy works. When you spend money to buy food it helps this lady's business. It makes it more likely somebody is going to find work. So instead of asking questions, answer mine: are you going to buy some food?

Q Yes.

THE PRESIDENT: Okay, good. What would you like?

Q Ribs.

THE PRESIDENT: Ribs? Good. Let's order up some ribs.

Q What do you think of the democratic field, sir?

THE PRESIDENT: See, his job is to ask questions, he thinks my job is to answer every question he asks. I'm here to help this restaurant by buying some food. Terry, would you like something?

Q An answer.

Q Can we buy some questions?

THE PRESIDENT: Obviously these people -- they make a lot of money and they're not going to spend much. I'm not saying they're overpaid, they're just not spending any money.

Q Do you think it's all going to come down to national security, sir, this election?

THE PRESIDENT: One of the things David does, he asks a lot of questions, and they're good, generally.

END 11:29 A.M. MST

adcott color to day vba variant for windows

this is another vba program intended to go into my "vba portfolio"

this is a use of the concept expressed in adcott's journal. Specifically this post. Adcott is wicked smart. I've stayed as true as i could to the concept, using excel to calculate the three sine waves and vba to call the Windows API and drop the appropriate colors to windows. (watch for text wrapping, although i've used the teletype html tag, which should prevent it.)

how to use:
1) open excel, create a new workbook.
2) hit Alt-Function11 (this will open the Visual Basic Editor) (or tools>macro>macros>type auto_open in "Macro Name" and hit "create.")
3) paste all of the code below into the module.
4) "x" out of the visual basic editor
5) save the workbook

6) whenever you open the excel file, be sure to "enable macros." upon opening, the book will change the desktop colors to colors fitting adcott's original program. (since these colors are just dropped to the stack and not really called by any windows program, they won't stay after shutdown unless you go into the Desktop control panel and save them, so they are "volatile..." which is nice if you futz with the code and set all the rgb values for all the variables to zero or something equally as prankish. just reboot and anything funky disappears.) if you run this many times in a row, it will eat the stack space and windows will crash. DISCLAIMER: if you hit Alt-Tab in the middle of the API calls, you can crash some older windows networks. (REAL old networks, we are talking win 3.11 era here.) the chances of it affecting a modern network are slim to none, but i don't want to be blamed for any screwups.

BEGIN CODE!

' DONT TOUCH From Here to Below, !
' we are declaring objects that will control each aspect
' of the windows appearance GUI

Declare Function SetSysColors Lib "user32" _
(ByVal nChanges As Long, lpSysColor As _
Long, lpColorValues As Long) As Long


Public Const COLOR_SCROLLBAR = 0 'The Scrollbar color'
Public Const COLOR_BACKGROUND = 1 'Color of the background with no wallpaper'
Public Const COLOR_ACTIVECAPTION = 2 'Caption of Active Window'
Public Const COLOR_INACTIVECAPTION = 3 'Caption of Inactive window'
Public Const COLOR_MENU = 4 'Menu'
Public Const COLOR_WINDOW = 5 'Windows background'
Public Const COLOR_WINDOWFRAME = 6 'Window frame'
Public Const COLOR_MENUTEXT = 7 'Window Text'
Public Const COLOR_WINDOWTEXT = 8 '3D dark shadow (Win95)'
Public Const COLOR_CAPTIONTEXT = 9 'Text in window caption'
Public Const COLOR_ACTIVEBORDER = 10 'Border of active window'
Public Const COLOR_INACTIVEBORDER = 11 'Border of inactive window'
Public Const COLOR_APPWORKSPACE = 12 'Background of MDI desktop'
Public Const COLOR_HIGHLIGHT = 13 'Selected item background'
Public Const COLOR_HIGHLIGHTTEXT = 14 'Selected menu item'
Public Const COLOR_BTNFACE = 15 'Button'
Public Const COLOR_BTNSHADOW = 16 '3D shading of button'
Public Const COLOR_GRAYTEXT = 17 'Grey text, of zero if dithering is used.
Public Const COLOR_BTNTEXT = 18 'Button text'
Public Const COLOR_INACTIVECAPTIONTEXT = 19 'Text of inactive window'
Public Const COLOR_BTNHIGHLIGHT = 20 '3D highlight of button'
Public Const COLOR_2NDACTIVECAPTION = 27 'Win98 only: 2nd active window color
Public Const COLOR_2NDINACTIVECAPTION = 28 'Win98 only: 2nd inactive window color

Declare Function GetSysColor Lib "user32" (ByVal nIndex As Long) As Long

'END OF DON"T TOUCH

Sub Auto_open()
' concept from http://www.livejournal.com/users/adcott/340917.html
' derive a julian day from the date, and express this as
' a function of three superimposed sine waves
' each wave representing the respective rgb values in a RGB color
' each color would correspond to the respective season
' (in the northern hemisphere.) blues correspond to winter
' greens for springs, yellows are summer, orange and red for fall
' purples/blues back to winter again.


'red at zero, green at neg 365 blue at 365 produces the truest effect
'to adcott's original hypothesis
Dim jday1 As Date
Dim jday As Date
Dim redphase as integer
Dim bluephase as integer
Dim greenphase as integer
dim test as variant
dim black as integer
dim white as integer
dim red as integer
dim green as integer
dim blue as integer

redphase = 0
greenphase = 365
bluephase = -365



jday1 = Date

' uncomment the lines below for the ability to allow
' the user to enter the date
'jday1 = InputBox("Date?")
'test = IsDate(jday1)
'If test <> True Then Exit Sub
''''''''end of lines to uncomment.

jday = CDate2Julian(jday1)

red = Int(128 * Sin(2 * 3.14 * 6 * jday + redphase * 3.14)) + 128
green = Int(128 * Sin(2 * 3.14 * 6 * jday + greenphase * 3.14)) + 128
blue = Int(128 * Sin(2 * 3.14 * 6 * jday + bluephase * 3.14)) + 128
black = Abs(Int(blue * 0.1))
white = Abs(Int(blue / 0.1))

Select Case white
'don't let "white" get darker than 25% grey
Case Is < 190
white = white + 190
End Select

Select Case black
'don't let "black" get lighter than 75% grey
Case Is > 100
black = black - 100
End Select

'Titlebars
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_ACTIVECAPTION, RGB(red, green, blue))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_ACTIVEBORDER, RGB(Abs(Int(red / 10)), Abs(Int(green / 10)), Abs(Int(blue / 10))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_CAPTIONTEXT, RGB(white, white, white))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_INACTIVECAPTION, RGB(Abs(Int(red / 2)), Abs(Int(green / 2)), Abs(Int(blue / 2))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_INACTIVEBORDER, RGB(Abs(Int(red / 10)), Abs(green / 10), Abs(blue / 10)))

t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_INACTIVECAPTIONTEXT, RGB(Abs(Int(blue / 0.1)), Abs(Int(blue / 0.1)), Abs(Int(blue / 0.1))))

'Button
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_BTNTEXT, RGB(black, black, black))
't& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_BTNFACE, RGB(192, 192, 192))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_BTNFACE, RGB(190 + Abs(Int(red / 10)), 190 + Abs(Int(green / 10)), 190 + Abs(Int(blue / 10))))

't& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_BTNSHADOW, RGB(50 + Abs(Int(red / 10)), 50 + Abs(Int(green / 10)), 50 + Abs(Int(blue / 10))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_BTNSHADOW, RGB(220 + Abs(Int(red / 10)), 220 + Abs(Int(green / 10)), 220 + Abs(Int(blue / 10))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_BTNHIGHLIGHT, RGB(220 + Abs(Int(red / 10)), 220 + Abs(Int(green / 10)), 220 + Abs(Int(blue / 10))))
'Textwindow
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_WINDOW, RGB(white, white, white))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_SCROLLBAR, RGB(red, green, blue))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_WINDOWTEXT, RGB(black, black, black))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_WINDOWFRAME, RGB(black, black, black))
'Background
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_BACKGROUND, RGB(Abs(Int(red * 0.9)), Abs(Int(green * 0.9)), Abs(Int(blue * 0.9))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_APPWORKSPACE, RGB(Abs(Int(red * 0.5)), Abs(Int(green * 0.5)), Abs(Int(blue * 0.5))))
'Menus
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_MENU, RGB(190 + Abs(Int(red / 10)), 190 + Abs(Int(green / 10)), 190 + Abs(Int(blue / 10))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_MENUTEXT, RGB(black, black, black))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_GREYTEXT, RGB(Abs(Int(red / 3)), Abs(Int(green / 3)), Abs(Int(blue / 3))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_HIGHLIGHT, RGB(Abs(Int(red * 0.5)), Abs(Int(green * 0.5)), Abs(Int(blue * 0.5))))
t& = SetSysColors(1, COLOR_HIGHLIGHTTEXT, RGB(white, white, white))


End Sub

Function CDate2Julian(MyDate As Date) As String

CDate2Julian = Format(MyDate - DateSerial(Year(MyDate) - 1, 12, _
31), "000")

End Function


'END CODE.